shit's about to get real, yo

This, ladies and gents, is what losing 135 pounds does to your arms. It ain't pretty and when I talk about having bat wings, this is what I'm referring to.

That pocket of flesh just kind of hanging there underneath? That would be loose skin. Awfully schexy, isn't it? Unfortunately, it just kind of comes with the territory. I spent the entire duration of my twenties in the obese category and, honestly, it probably really started when I was about 16. My skin stretched to the point of no return and there's no way that's just snapping back into place. As such, I'm carring a couple pounds of what looks like a fucking pelican beak under each arm.

At this point I'm fairly used to it, despite it's annoyance. Unlike the excess skin on, say, my stomach, I can't exactly smooth out my arms with shapewear so I think I'm just more aware of it than the other pockets of loose skin around my body (abs, stomach, inner thighs are the worst culprits). Would I love to get rid of it? Abso-fucking-lutely. Unfortunately, this level of plastic surgery is considered cosmetic aka unnecessary aka expensive as hell.

Anyway, the other night I was in bed in a sleeveless shirt and happened to glance over and something looked sor of, I don't know, different about the loose skin. And that's when I noticed something odd.

Guess all those hours hating Jillian Michaels are paying off after all.

Love from the ashes,
Lady Lazarus

healthy living lessons from fleetwood mac

Papa G. and I celebrated Father's Day a little early. Saturday we went to Bac, one of my favorite restaurants in Cleveland (bonus: since Bac started offering brown rice, my two favorite meals there are both almost entirely Simply Filling!) followed by heading to The Q to see Fleetwood Mac in concert!

Playing with hats at 15 months. This has always been my favorite pic of me  & Papa G.

Sissy and I grew up listening to bands from the 1970s thanks to our dad and it is still my favorite genre of music. I don't listen to a lot of contemporary radio and I'm very unfamiliar with all current pop songs. But give me a classic rock station and I'm set for hours. (I'm also pretty sure my dad had to buy a new copy of their Greatest Hits album after I stole borrowed and "forgot" to return his original copy).

Despite the fact that I've been listening to this music, these songs, for about two decades, listening to them performed live gave me a new appreciation and understanding. I also realized how many of the lyrics could be taken as pretty sound advice. So, in honor of Father's Day I offer you some healthy living lessons from one of my dad's favorite bands.

Don't stop thinking about tomorrow, it'll soon be here. ["Don't Stop"]
We all have bad days. We all make bad decisions: eat things we know we shouldn't or slack off on our exercise. Anyone who says they are on point one hundred percent of the time is either lying or in complete denial.

The key, though, is to not let those bad days, those bad decisions, undo all of your hard work. Moreover, your past doesn't have to dictate your future. Why not think about the times to come and not about the things that you've done. If your life was bad to you, just think what tomorrow will do. No matter where you are right now at this very moment reading this post, always remember that every day is another opportunity to get it right. This means that you are never more than a day away from a fresh start.

You can go your own way. ["Go Your Own Way"] 
There's no right or wrong way to weight loss. I use Weight Watchers for food and run and do yoga for exercise. But that's just me and that's what works for me. That combination might not work for you and that's perfectly okay. Trust me, if there was some magic program out there that helped every single person lose weight the exact same way, there would be no need for an entire weight loss industry.

Maybe you follow a low carb plan or are a member of a meal delivery service. Perhaps you bike or swim. Whatever method you choose, make sure it's one that fits your lifestyle and is one you can sustain. For instance, I could never do anything super restrictive or one that limits, say, carbs. It's just not for me but I know other people out there thrive on that kind of diet. There is no right way or wrong way there is only the way that works for you.

Thunder only happens when it's raining. ["Dreams"] 
A little over two years ago I used to weigh 311 pounds. That sort of weight doesn't happen overnight nor does it happen accidentally. Likewise my own personal experience with overeating was a symptom, not a cause.

I can't speak for everyone on this issue, but from my anecdotal perspective, problems with weight that are so severe they put you in the obese category usually stem from something deeper. That is, the physical issues are only a tangible manifestation of inner mental issues. Every season of The Biggest Loser, Bob and Jillian have that heart-to-heart with the contestants to figure out why they have gotten themselves into their current state because it never stems from food alone. The food itself is another symptom of something else.

So keep this in mind: when you start off on this journey, your main focus is going to probably be losing the weight. The physical part. But it's probably a safe bet to assume that there are also mental and emotional parts hiding underneath all of that weight. Some of them you may already be working on. Some you may not discover until you've been at this for awhile. But they are there and dealing with them is potentially going to require more work and dedication than losing weight.

I've been afraid of changing 'cause I built my life around you. ["Landslide"]
Change can be scary. Changing your entire life is even scarier. We sometimes fall into habitual patterns and a comfort zone where we know what to expect from ourselves and from other people. Me, I built my entire sense of self around being the fat girl and it effected everything: not only where I shopped but how I approached the very act of going to the mall. Not only how I dated but how I related and engaged with men.  And don't even get me started on my relationship with food or fitness.

While I'm no longer that fat girl, a part of her still remains and, I think, always will but I can no longer make decisions based on my previous experiences. Old assumptions and attitudes have no place in my life and relationships and that's a bit scary because I can't look to the past to know how to go respond to new situations. I spent decades happily hiding away in my comfort zone watching life zip past and I was perfectly content with that. Now, though, I'm forced out into the big wide world and have to make things up as I go along and respond in the moment and it's not easy for me to do that.

But as scary as it is to leave the old me behind, the alternative of staying hidden away in my little cocoon is so much worse.

Follow those who pale in your shadow ["Gold Dust Woman"]
Just as I know there are people who get inspiration from my journey, there are other bloggers that leave me completely in awe of their story (and one of these days I'll get around to putting together a post about them, I promise).

The thing is, it can be easy to get overwhelmed by their progress. In the beginning you look at their Before and After pictures and realize that this is a real person who did what seems impossible and if they can do it, so can you. But eventually you realize how  much work it takes and they are so far ahead of you and how will you ever manage to catch up?

It's not a competition, though. That seems like pretty basic logic but it's easy to forget. We all have our own stories to tell, in our own time. Yes, it's impressive when the people you admire do things you aren't able to yet, like run marathons or lose 100 pounds. And it's okay to look up to them, to want to follow in their footsteps. But just remember that you have your own path to blaze. Your story is just as impressive, your choices just as awe-inspiring.

So rock on, ancient queen and never compare your first song with someone else's complete album.

Any other Fleetwood Mac fans out there? 

Love from the ashes,
Lady Lazarus

how to survive a wedding

Where did the time go? I swear it feels like yesterday that Sissy called to tell me she was engaged and now her wedding is only two weeks away! 

No. Seriously. Where did the time go?

Obviously weddings can be somewhat stressful for those of us trying to actively maintain a healthy lifestyle, what with all of that food and cake. Lots of cake. And candy, in Sissy's case, as she's having a candy buffet. Oh yes. Cake and candy. 

Gird your garters, ladies and gents, 'cause it's time for another Survival Guide.

Start The Day Off Right

Y'all know I'm a huge supporter of breakfast and eat it every single day. Breakfast gives you energy to get through the day and with the right food choices it will also help keep you full through lunch (so you aren't raiding the vending machine at work or your hotel for a less-than-stellar snack). 

While your instinct might lead you to want to skip breakfast and/or lunch so you have plenty of "room" for the dinner at the reception, skipping meals can actually backfire as when you do get a chance to eat you might go completely overboard from sheer hunger. Also, I don't know about you but I am definitely someone who can fall into that hangry (angry + hungry) state of mind without food and that's just not a fun wedding guest (or, well, in my case this time around maid of honor). 

Dance The Night Away 

The beauty of weddings is that -- if you are lucky -- you can both start and end your day with exercise. Being a bit of an early riser I fully hope to get a run in before the wedding preparations begin. If you are attending an out of town wedding, check to see if the hotel you are staying at offers a fitness facility or just run around outside in the neighborhood (keeping in mind my outdoor running safety tips!) If you're one of the bridesmaids, consider helping the bride release some pre-wedding jitters with a morning yoga class.

If exercising before the wedding isn't feasible then be sure to take advantage of that dance floor at the reception! Dancing is a great way to burn calories and have fun with family and friends.

Appraise The Appetizers 

It's common to have snacks available to guests before dinner, often giving the bridal party a chance for pictures before joining everyone at the reception. Scope out the fruits and veggies and go easy on the cheese and crackers.

That being said, weddings can and usually are all day events and several hours could go by between meals or an opportunity for food, even with appetizers available. So consider packing your own emergency stash of food if you need something to nosh on before the big meal. Fruit and string cheese, maybe peanut butter sandwich or even just a couple of hard-boiled eggs. Whatever you pick, make sure protein is represented as that's what will keep you full. 

Cocktail Hour

Wine at the reception, champagne for the toast, beers at the local bar once the evening is over...weddings can be quite an alcohol laden event, so be sure not to drink your calories away (plus, just as no one likes a drunk bride, no one likes a drunk wedding guest either). I'm not saying you have to completely avoid alcohol all together, just set yourself a guideline. Maybe allow yourself 1-2 glasses of wine and then once you have those, that's it.

Let Them Eat Cake

Like drinking at a wedding reception, I'm not saying you have to completely avoid the wedding cake (unless you want to, of course!), just be smart. Plan for a piece of cake when you are making other food choices or use some of you Activity Points or calories earned through exercise. Even better, split a piece of cake with a family or friend sitting at your table.

If nothing else, always remember that weddings are fun and joyous events and that should be celebrated! So maybe that means letting yourself off the hook for the night and plan to get back on track the next day.

What are some of your healthy wedding reception tips?

Love from the ashes,

Lady Lazarus

google reader alternatives

As many of you probably already know, good ol' Google Reader is being phased out at the end of the month. As one of the more well known ways to follow favorite blogs, this makes things tricky for both blog readers and writers. Luckily there are plenty of other methods for following my blog or finding out when a new post gets published.

Bloglovin'

I finally jumped on the Bloglovin' bandwagon a few weeks ago and so far really like it. It was easy to transfer all of my subscriptions from Google Reader over and the iPhone app means I can read blogs on the go!

FeedBlitz 

Enter your Email:

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Maybe an RSS reader like Bloglovin' isn't your thing. Maybe you prefer to get your blogs in your email. If that's the case, then FeedBlitz is for you. All you have to do is put your email address in the box above to subscribe and whenever I have a new post it will be delivered straight to your inbox. Pretty snazzy, right?

(Plus, y'know, it's a sneaky way to get around employers who perhaps might frown on you reading blogs at work. Just sayin')

RSS

If you have another RSS feed service you enjoy using, here is the URL for my blog's feed.

Facebook & Twitter

Obviously these aren't the traditional route to following a blog, but I do post new posts on both services. It's also a good way to interact with me outside of just reading the blog, so be sure to Like the Facebook page or Follow Me On Twitter for updates!

What are some of the ways you follow your favorite blogs? Also, congrats to Diana for winning the GI Jayne kickboxing DVD! Hope you enjoy it as much as I have!

Love from the ashes,
Lady Lazarus

and now for something completely different: weight watchers simply filling plan

Bit of blog keeping: Tomorrow is the last day to enter the giveaway to win a copy of GI Jayne's Kickboxing DVD. If you haven't entered yet, do so soon!

I've been counting Points for so long -- 2 1/2 years this time around, but essentially on and off for over 10 years -- that I honestly forgot that Weight Watchers offers an alternative to counting: the Simply Filling technique (or Core on the old plan).

But to understand the big difference in Simply Filling and why I'm opting to try it out for a few weeks, I first need to give y'all a Weight Watchers crash course.

PointsPlus works like this: based on a variety of factors like gender, height, and, of course, weight, you are given a set number of Daily Points. When I started back at 311 pounds it was somewhere in the mid-high 40s. As you lose weight, your daily points decrease with the lowest points possible being 26. Foods then are assigned points values using a formula that looks at the nutritional value, specifically carbs, fat, fiber, and protein. If you want to eat something you have to figure out the food points and see if it fits into your daily points. If you go over your daily points or have a special occasion or just want to splurge, you are given 49 Weekly Points to use or not use as you see fit. Everyone gets 49 Weeklies regardless of weight. You  can also earn additional points through exercise (called Activity Points). Fruit is 0 points as are most veggies (starchy items like corn and taters have points). There are also the Good Health Guidelines or recommend servings for certain types of groups like dairy, fruits and veggies, and oil. Some of these things -- like the dairy and oil -- have Points, so when planning a day you have to take those into account.

With PointsPlus, every food you eat gets tracked. Even the BLTs (Bite, Lick, or Taste). And, let me tell ya, it can get exhausting. Especially after this long. I think one of the reasons I've been struggling the past few months is because I'm tired. Tired of thinking about everything I eat. Tired of tracking. Tired of not just reading but studying nutritional labels. Just plain ol' freaking exhausted from the whole thing.

Which is where Simply Filling comes in.

With SF, you center your meals around the Power Foods list (in the online trackers these foods are indicated with a green arrow). If an item is on the Power Foods list you can eat as much as you would like until you feel satisfied without having to track it. The key here is satisfied: don't eat so much that you are stuffed but don't eat so little that you are still hungry. Essentially it's about letting your body's hunger level guide your food choices versus how many points you still have left for the day. You still get 49 Weekly Points and can continue to earn Activity Points so if you do want something not on the list ('cause, c'mon, no way I can give up peanut butter) you can use your WPs or APs for it and just track it like you normally would.

I honestly didn't know much about SF. I don't go to WW meetings so I don't have a leader to mention it every once in awhile and the website is very PointsPlus focused (which admittedly makes sense. Their entire brand is built around counting points). I do know there are bloggers who use SF -- Brooke was the first one who came to mind -- and Melissa also gave me a link where she talked about her experience doing SF.

When I first looked at the Power Foods list -- with some additional foods, like available condiments listed here -- I was a bit skeptical. The list just didn't really seem that long. But then I started flipping through some of my favorite cookbooks and realized how many of my favorite meals -- including at restaurants -- are either already SF friendly or would only require dipping into a couple of my WPs per serving.

I admit I've gotten kind of lazy as of late in the kitchen. I just haven't been cooking as much and either using frozen dinners or just throwing a sandwich and chips together for a quick lunch. Sure, it gets the job done but obviously eating more whole foods would be better. Plus I miss cooking, but it adds another level of exhaustion onto Weight Watchers because you have to figure out the points for serving sizes using their Recipe Builder. Being able to dive back into my cookbook collection and working with familiar foods in a new way that won't always require the recipe builder excites me. Like over the weekend I found a recipe in a cookbook that was just whole wheat rotini, corn, black beans, and salsa pretty much thrown together. Super filling, super easy, and all foods off the Power List. So filling that I didn't even need to eat the entire serving I gave myself which is the entire point here. If I was still counting, it would probably have been a recipe I passed over because I knew all of those foods -- no matter how healthy and nutritious they may be -- would add up to a high point dish.

With SF you are making yourself listen to your hunger cues. If you are hungry, eat something and stop when you feel satisfied. My hunger cues and I have been out of whack since I was about fifteen so this will be a challenge but a necessary one. I also have been wanting to eat cleaner but had no idea where to start and the Power Foods List is an excellent place to start. Plus, hello, I can eat potatoes again. Starchy veggies and carbs are given Points on Points Plus and have to be counted so I don't even them that often so being able to make breakfast potatoes over the weekend with a side toasted light bread made this breakfast lover more happy than she can even say.

I've only been at this for a few days so I'm still learning as I go but so far I'm liking this alternative Weight Watchers plan. I also am, admittedly, giving myself extra work by continuing to count points in a notebook but it's mostly just for comparison purposes. That being said, even just a few days in there are a few things I'm not liking about the way WW actually handles SF (mostly having to do with food in the online tracker), but that's for another post. After I've been on SF for a little while longer I'll come back with a follow-up!

Have you ever tried Simply Filling before? Any advice or favorite recipes for me?

Love from the ashes,
Lady Lazarus